December 20, 2006
Women of the World, UNITE!
So
I was doing nothing at work today except cleaning out the multiple piles of research that have accumulated over the year. I used up 6 trash bags and then I had to stop because I ran out of bags. There's still some stacks left but at least my desk is looking less like a toy fort with battlements of research notes.
As usual, I was multi-tasking and breaking up the tedium of cleaning up by chatting with friends. While chatting with my childhood friend, I got to thinking about the amount of time females spend bitching about guys.
Let's assume the following.
1) 6.6 bn people in the world, of which 50% are female, so that gives us 3.3bn females.
2) 40% of females are in the age range 25-45 (assuming this is the prime bitching age) so that gives us 1.32 bn females.
3) Take away some proportion who have good taste (i.e. lesbians) and let's conservatively assume that we have a total of 1 bn females. (This also makes the numbers work much easier.)
If we spend 2 hours a day bitching about guys, that equates to 720 bn human hours a year. Think about what we could do with 720 bn human hours. All that lost productivity at work griping with friends about how he forgot something when you've only brought it up like ten times the last 2 days, when you could be initiating coverage on some obscure software company; all those hours spent in coffeehouses sipping your mocha (with your pinkie sticking out delicately) complaining about what he said, and asking them what they thought he meant when he said what he said; all the time spent listening to friends saying "I told you so!" and bawling your eyes out; all the internal turmoil wondering if you need to talk or if it was a good time to call or if you'd just push him away by appearing to be too needy...
Just imagine, if we had put our minds to it, instead of wasting it on bitching about guys and the stupid mind games that they play (or that we think they play), we could have turned the world into one big matriarchical society, like that extremely enlightened tribe somewhere in the vast reaches of China, where women have multiple husbands and make all the financial decisions. (Note to self: move to China to enroll in tribe.)
And then we would have turned guys into our bitches.
Posted by scrabbyfoo at December 20, 2006 04:31 PM