Assorted Ravings of the Slightly-Weird

"Because They're Mine"

A few weeks ago, while on one of the many many business trips, I found myself in the following situation.

There I was, in my hotel room on the 22nd floor, having a heated discussion with the person on the other line. As I was talking, I was pacing up and down in front of the window, occasionally gesticulating furiously with one hand, occasionally pulling my hair or clenching my fist to prevent a potential meltdown while holding the mobile with the other. This went on for about 15 minutes until I looked out the window at the hotel across the road.

And there, just a few floors above me, there was a guy who was seemingly in the same situation as me. I stopped pacing and stood there, watching him. And as I watched, he paced up and down, sat down on his chair, got up and paced some more, pulled at his tie, ran his fingers through his hair; all the while on his mobile phone.

I had to smile, even though the conversation I was in the midst of having was nowhere near funny. While I had no clue what my "twin" was upset about, I felt some kind of empathy for him and from a third-party perspective there was something funny about two strangers reacting in identical ways, mirroring each other across the road, 60 odd metres above the city.

I guess my takeaway from this is that while your problems seem to be the biggest in the world, the same holds true for everyone else. I remember one scene from Ally McBeal (I used to love that show - it was mandatory viewing every Tuesday night on Fox during my cable-less college years) where Ally was asked why her problems were bigger than anyone else's. With a surprised look on her face, as if to say it was a silly question, she replied: "Because they're mine."

But seeing that guy through the window, I realised that perspective is everything. Boil things down to the simplest of elements and every person has the same problems as the guy next door: the root causes and the solutions are less varied than you think.

It was then that I realised, nothing is totally unbearable. Because somewhere out there, someone is going through similar shit, if not the same shit, as you.

Flashback

Today, inexplicably, I woke up and for the briefest moment I was back in primary school.

Uniform and all, with the white socks almost up to my knees and the Bata shoes gleaming white from the liquid paper-like substance that I had to slather over my shoes every Sunday night until the canvas shoes became almost as tough as leather. In my flashback, it was just after recess. So there we all were, crouched over the drains diligently brushing our teeth.

I still remember my cup - it was a red cup with my name labelled on it. Does anyone remember those early-age labelling machines - they were round and you fed some kind of tape into them and manually adjusted the letters? Whatever do you call that machine, if it can even be classified as one?

I digress. So there we were, 40-odd of us P1 students, brushing our teeth. Up and down, up and down. Left and right, left and right. Rinse, spit, repeat.

I have no idea why my mind chose to bring back this memory. Maybe I'm not brushing my teeth properly, and my subconscious is trying to remind me of the drills we learnt way back when. Or maybe I'm yearning for a time when life was much simpler, when all we had to do was go to school and finish our homework on time. All I had to worry about back then was remembering to bring the right books to school, and not be late. (Rather than worrying about donkeys.)

Speaking of school, I went back to my alma mater recently. Here's a cheap thrill: seeing your name up on a board in your secondary school. Hah. I went back and to my surprise, there it was, right near the main driveway. 2 boards listing the various houses that had won over the years (and satisfyingly, the board was predominantly blue) and their captains. A concrete, physical sign that for four years I was there and had, in some way, left my mark. It was so funny, I had to take a photo of myself, pointing at my name.

It's bittersweet to revisit. You go back and you remember the fun times you spent in school with all your friends, and how little things seemed so important then. You pop by your old classrooms, you visit with some of the teachers who are still there. You see the students walking around and you wonder if you were ever that small, that young, that raw. You look around with a smile on your face, a smile that is tinged with sadness because you know that you'll never be able to go back and experience it all over again.

Maybe my flashback today was just another reminder of that: that life goes forward and we go forward with it whether we want to or not. But sometimes, it's nice to remember and to relive it for the briefest of moments.

Life Lessons

It's raining again, after glorious weather over the weekend and on Monday. Sigh. And here I was, prematurely rejoicing.

Anyhow, I was just thinking about life lessons I have gleaned over the past year and a half.

1) Patience is a virtue. 'Cos sometimes things take a long time to mature but most of the time it's the worthwhile things. It's a skill I'm still having to learn the hard way though.

2) Ignorance is bliss. But only to a certain point where you really can't keep your eyes shut anymore. Then after that you just look stupid if you keep ignoring what's right in front of you.

3) Knowledge is empowering. It enables you to make decisions and change things. Sometimes it's painful to have full knowledge but in the long run I'd rather know all than be a fool. That way, I can't blame anyone but myself for anything that happens.

4) Trust is key. 'Cos without trust things eventually crumble. And it gets way too tiring to have to constantly be checking up on people, and to constantly be wondering about what they're up to.

5) Optimism is sustaining. 'Cos without hope, we'd all be down in the dumps every single tedious day.

Happy Tuesday! :D

The Pursuit of Happiness

I'm not sure.

I'm glad things are out in the open. I'm glad we all know what's going on. I don't know how things will turn out, but I've changed the equation. And maybe that's all that was needed. (And if you're reading this, which I suspect you are, I don't know what to say that doesn't sound trite except that it hurts for me too.)

I wonder why it's so hard to find happiness. I hear all these sad stories from all perspectives and it's getting tougher to not be cynical. I'd rather be alone than have stuff like that happen to me. And yet I know chances are that they will, if I stay on this road.

Maybe not all of us get the happy fairy-tale ending (and those who do shouldn't be taking things for granted). Maybe we find happiness in other ways: in family and friends who love us and support us; in being grateful for the little things in life; in seeing the beauty in nature; in being physically and mentally (and sometimes financially) able to do what we want.

And so I say, "Screw it. Life's short enough. Why waste time being unhappy?" If something makes me happy and if I am fully cognizant of all the consequences and repercussions of my actions, why shouldn't I go ahead and do it? And once something makes me unhappy (enough), I should get rid of it.

I think these two lines really sum up my philosophy (and yes I realise I'm misquoting the song here):

"就算下一秒坎坷这一秒是快乐的
天地辽阔相遇多难的"

I can't tell the future but I can see the here and now. I know what I want, even if it's not good for me, and I know what I should want. The question is, do you?

P.S.: There are really only 2 "you"s that this is addressed to. The rest of you, thank you for being here. I'm not quite there yet, but I'm getting to it.

Women of the World, UNITE!

So I was doing nothing at work today except cleaning out the multiple piles of research that have accumulated over the year. I used up 6 trash bags and then I had to stop because I ran out of bags. There's still some stacks left but at least my desk is looking less like a toy fort with battlements of research notes.

As usual, I was multi-tasking and breaking up the tedium of cleaning up by chatting with friends. While chatting with my childhood friend, I got to thinking about the amount of time females spend bitching about guys.

Let's assume the following.
1) 6.6 bn people in the world, of which 50% are female, so that gives us 3.3bn females.
2) 40% of females are in the age range 25-45 (assuming this is the prime bitching age) so that gives us 1.32 bn females.
3) Take away some proportion who have good taste (i.e. lesbians) and let's conservatively assume that we have a total of 1 bn females. (This also makes the numbers work much easier.)

If we spend 2 hours a day bitching about guys, that equates to 720 bn human hours a year. Think about what we could do with 720 bn human hours. All that lost productivity at work griping with friends about how he forgot something when you've only brought it up like ten times the last 2 days, when you could be initiating coverage on some obscure software company; all those hours spent in coffeehouses sipping your mocha (with your pinkie sticking out delicately) complaining about what he said, and asking them what they thought he meant when he said what he said; all the time spent listening to friends saying "I told you so!" and bawling your eyes out; all the internal turmoil wondering if you need to talk or if it was a good time to call or if you'd just push him away by appearing to be too needy...

Just imagine, if we had put our minds to it, instead of wasting it on bitching about guys and the stupid mind games that they play (or that we think they play), we could have turned the world into one big matriarchical society, like that extremely enlightened tribe somewhere in the vast reaches of China, where women have multiple husbands and make all the financial decisions. (Note to self: move to China to enroll in tribe.)

And then we would have turned guys into our bitches.

A Little Bit of Me

Stealing this from pblossom cos I thought it was interesting and worth a couple of minutes on a fairly lazy Friday afternoon:

1. My ex is: or rather, my ex-es are all married, some happily, some not; 2 with kids, 2 without.

2. Maybe I should: spend less time playing Web Sudoku at work, or clean up my room.

3. I love: family and friends, softball/baseball, tanning and relaxing.

4. I don't understand: how the Internet works, for one.

5. I lose: my things on a regular basis when they get sucked into the black hole that is my room.

6. People say I'm: weird.

7. Love is: a pain in the ass but but a whole lot of fun, laughter and tears. And when you've found it, treasure it.

8. Somewhere, someone is: waiting for me.

9. I will always be: optimistic.

10. Forever is: a near-impossibility.

11. I never want: to not be happy, and to be questioning my choices.

12. I think the current US President: sucks, was a horrible choice to begin with, and holds a lot of responsibility for the sorry state of the world.

13. When I wake up in the morning: depending on where I am, I either feel refreshed or tired.

14. My past was: a whole lotta fun.

15. I get annoyed when: people (i.e. my mom) treat me like a kid, or drive badly. I also get annoyed when I make silly mistakes.

16. Parties are for: EVERYONE!

17: My dog is: or rather, my dogs Max and Bonnie are overly inquisitive, very friendly and sometimes a little smelly. (And yes, Terry and Elsa, Scooby and Hunter, I miss you all.)

18. My cat is: or rather, my cats will come soon (akan datang) when I morph into Crazy Cat Lady.

19: Kisses are the best when: they're spontaneous.

20: Tomorrow is: SATURDAY! Woohoo.

21: I really want: to be chilling on a beach (without sandflies) for the rest of my life with good books, ice-cold drinks and a guy by my side whom I can talk to, entertain and be entertained by, and love and be loved by.

22: I have low tolerance for people who: (ok this could take a while)
- don't know how to drive around a roundabout
- don't signal (unless you're already in the turning lane, then that's fine)
- are ignorant and yet arrogant
- rub me the wrong way
- are show-offs
- go around dipping their pen in the company ink well on a continual basis
- get by on their looks and don't use their brains
- ask me stupid questions
(For more, see my "Pet Peeves" section.)

Bye Bye '05...

... and happy 2006!

I commemorated the new year by spending it with friends, friends and more friends. NYE was spent at China One with an assortment of pals, and I actually got happy enough (not drunk, just happy) to climb up onto a bed and dance for a bit. Woohoo.

Then, the next day my primary and secondary school friends came over for a reunion with some of our teachers, which was really cool. It was great to see the teachers again and test their brain power to see if they remembered all our names.

Finally, last night the Cal gang came over for another reunion. The turnout was surprisingly good, and I got to see some faces that I hadn't seen for a while.

All in all, a great start to 2006. To bid a fond farewell to 2005, here's my year-in-review.

1) Weddings attended: not too many this year, just 2 that I can think of. (Although one was fairly important since it kinda catalysed the whole thing with PJ...)

2) Parties thrown: quite a few recently since the cooking bug suddenly bit me.

3) Mileage racked up in a year: not more than 13000, which is slightly less than 2004.
3a) Amount spent on Sam's petrol: $1858.64!!! Damn you, high oil prices...

4) Holidays taken: 2 - USA, Bintan. How pathetic is that?!?
4a) Work trips taken: India twice, Hong Kong twice times, Shanghai once, Beijing twice, Seoul, Brazil, US

5) Days out on sick leave (some real, most fake): Too few to count... Plus, now that the workload is getting heavier the price to pay for malingering is getting way too high.

6) Items bought on eBay: not that many actually, my addiction is getting better. But, now I've started shopping a lot more at retail outlets back home. Crap.
6a) Items bought on VSC: also down from last year :D

7) Boyfriends: zero/one depending on definitions. Hahaha.
7a) Flings: one/two depending on definitions. Hahaha.

8) Stayovers there: 5

That's it. All in all, 2005 is probably best described as "the year I worked a lot harder". Which explains the raise but doesn't explain why I'm still not promoted.

Thanks for Nothing, Dipshit

Here's the background for the BQOTD.

A good friend of mine had a boyfriend towards the end of JC, and he ended up breaking her heart after about 2 years. Nothing new in this story, except that after that he turned out to be really lousy at keeping in touch despite claiming that he wanted to do so. And, he caused her a lot of angst because of that.

So, recently she was clearing out her stuff and she found a present from him, and she was wondering what to do with it so she sent out an email to a couple of us to get our opinions. Most people reacted rationally and actually analysed the situation, coming up with options like "If you want it to remember him by, then keep it. If you can remember him without a physical object then you can throw it away."

*yawn*

My reply:

"Burn the fucking thing. Preferably at the stroke of midnight on some dark and stormy night, along with all the other crap he gave you. And if you can dance around the flaming bucket chanting a hex (or a few), that would be better still.

Either that or send it back to him with a simple 'Thanks for nothing, dipshit.'"

My friend is often puzzled as to why I dislike her ex that much. He's actually a nice guy, and I know that personally since we all have common friends. The thing is, she's one of the strongest persons I know and I don't think I've ever seen her cry except for that one time, which I suppose only goes to show how much he must have hurt her. That is the key reason why I'll never forgive the fucker, even though I know he's a good person who just didn't handle the breakup very well.

So the moral of this story is, don't mess with my friends.

Addendum: And don't mess with my family either.

Pblossom's Tag

Apparently, I've been tagged by this person. So here goes:

7 things that scare me
Cockroaches
Running meetings with my bosses around
Losing my family
Losing my mind
Having to depend on others when I get old
Losing the ability to communicate while my mind is still clear
Not knowing what's beyond the white light

7 things I like the most
Playing softball/tennis/basketball/volleyball
Tanning on a beach
Diving
Hanging out with family and friends
Driving on Highway 1
Living in the Bay Area
Reading/quiet time

7 important things in my room
My bed
My computer
My plush chairs
My baby pillow and bolster
My books
My art and craft junk
My clothes/makeup/shoes

7 random facts about me
I am freakishly untidy
I can sleep till 3pm on weekends
I have big hands and feet for someone of my height
I love buying new clothes/shoes but I hate wearing them
When I drive on my own I have mini concerts
I didn't realise I actually like eggplant until about 4 weeks ago
I hate papayas, cucumbers and corn. Eggplant was on this list up till about 4 weeks ago

7 things I plan to do before I die
Learn to ride a motorbike
Travel to Antartica amongst other places
Clean up my room and organise my closet
Work/live in another country
Learn a couple more languages
Sky dive/bungee jump
Build something with my bare hands

7 things I can do
Karaoke (especially Rene Liu and Sandy Lam songs)
Speed read
Remember people and numbers well
Play ball
Curse like a sailor
Drive fast
Bitch for hours and over-analyse things

7 things I can't do
Clean my room to save my life
Organise my closet to save my life
Slide while baserunning
Hit a home run
Roll my "R"s
Resist potato chips
Make the move on any guy

7 things I say the most
"Fucking signal, you fucker!" (when driving)
"Man, I hate work" (when bitching)
"I mean, like, what the fuck, man!" (when bitching)
"Nah bei" (mostly when driving)
"You suck" (mostly shouting at the TV screen when baseball is on)
"Hey, wussup?" (when catching up with friends)
"Damn, he's hot. I'd do him." (just in general)

7 celeb crushes
Kevin Bacon
Juan Carlos Ferrero
Edison Chen
Rodrigo Santoro
Vincent Ng
Carl Ng
Orlando Bloom but only as Legolas

7 people who have to do this
* Not that there are 7 people who read this... but hiyah, it's the last category
Des
Marie
June
FJ
Squeaky
Cheng
CTG? Hahahahaha

3.3...

... million dollars.

THREE POINT THREE MILLION DOLLARS.

That's how much I made for my company today. Holy shit, dudes. That's the type of money I'll never see in my life, and yet today I had a hand in making that amount for my company.

And, if I don't see a cut of this in my year-end bonus, you can bet 3.3mn dollars that I will be raising a stink about it.

HOLY SHIT!!

And hell yeah, staying up till 4am was worth it.

All About...

... CTG. Which is what I've been promising to write about for the past two entries. But this is going to be a fairly disjointed entry because I can't for the life of me put together something that sounds coherent.

In a comment on an earlier post, B asked how I knew CTG doesn't read this. Simply put, I asked and it turns out CTG has forgotten the URL so it's fairly safe to assume that he doesn't read it. But then I got to thinking, so what if CTG reads this? I mean, so I think he's cute. Big fat hairy deal. It's nothing to get embarassed about, even if he somehow finds out. In fact, let's make it more obvious.

I THINK CTG IS CUTE.

There, I've said it. I've been "proud and loud".

Now whether anything happens from that (assuming that he somehow remembers the URL) will be a different matter. Which brings me to another point. Over the past week, CTG and I hung out a lot and, to me at least, we got along pretty well together. (Maybe he thinks I'm some kind of a pest.) Anyhow, it didn't seem like he was interested in anything else besides hanging out, so one friend suggested that either he's gay or he's not interested.

I'm not sure which is more disappointing. I mean, it'd be kinda embarassing to come onto someone who plays for a different team (IYKWIM). But on the other hand, it's probably easier to take the rejection due to someone being gay than just not being interested. With the first the problem lies with him; with the second the problem lies with me. So it's really easier to assume "Oh he's gay" rather than "He's not interested".

And that brings me to the 3rd point of the night. Which is, in this day and age gaydars have to be pretty much precise to the 2nd decimal point to be able to detect anything that is not overtly, flamboyantly gay.

It used to be that guys who were nicely dressed and well groomed had a higher chance of being gay, but now you've got metrosexuals running all over the place having facials, manicures and pedicures, getting their clothes tailored and in general paying a lot more attention to themselves. So bang, there goes that theory.

Another theory a friend has is that for Asian guys at least, guys with muscular bodies tend to be gay. I dunno on this one: wasn't working out supposed to be a guy thing? Since when was it supposed to mean anything else? But I've been told that certain gyms are gay hangout spots, so there could be some truth to it, though it seems fairly iffy to me.

So what can you do? You meet a guy who's well-dressed, well-groomed and well-built and he could be well-dressed, well-groomed and well-built because he's gay or because he's straight. What's a girl to do to tell these days? In one of my favourite movies, "For Love of the Game", Kelly Preston's character says over dinner to Kevin Costner's character that she wishes things could be easier and that people would wear tags that would say exactly what they were. So, you'd see a guy walking on a street and if his tag said "Single and available" then that'd be like jackpot. If it said "Neurotic after 2 weeks" you'd cross the street immediately to get out of his way. That way you waste so little time and avoid a ton of humiliation.

Anyway this post was supposed to be about CTG and in a way it still is. To summarise:
1) I think CTG is cute. (Duh. Else why would the "C" exist??") And frankly, I don't really care if he knows.
2) Since he doesn't seem interested, is it because he's not interested or is he NOT interested?
3) How the heck do you go about finding out if someone's not interested or NOT interested? Is there any kind of protocol to follow when you're trying to see if a guy is gay or not?

Ooooh. Comments already. Well firstly, I don't think distance should stop anyone. It sure as hell won't stop me. And secondly, I don't know what my tag would read. Possibly something like "No strings attached".

#202!

I've gone past my 200th entry without noticing it! The last time I had a blogging milestone (read entry #100) I tried my darndest to make it special, but the effort wasn't very well appreciated. This time around I've forgotten totally about it.

(And yes, I do realise that for some reason the tags on those entries read #211 and #109 respectively. I think it must be because I had some unpublished/deleted entries...)

My first entry was on December 8, 2003. The 100th entry was on July 7, 2004. The 200th entry was about my impending work trip (yawn) and was written on February 28, 2005. It took me 212 days to reach my first milestone and 236 days to reach my second. That means, my pace has slowed down from 0.47 posts a day to 0.42 posts a day. (And FYI, you can easily calculate the number of days in Excel so I barely spent 5 seconds calculating this.)

I wonder if this means I'm slowly losing my enthusiasm for blogging, given that
a) I've forgotten the milestone, and;
b) my pace is slowing down.

Or maybe it just means that I have less bullshit to write about these days...

And using the same handy Excel capability, here's a list of interesting facts.

1) I have been walking/talking/bugging people for 9952 days.
2) I studied in Singapore for 4351 days.
3) I spent 1371 days in Berkeley.
4) I have been working for 1547 days.
5) I have been playing softball for 6636 days.
6) I have been waiting for Flyboy for 1069 days. AND COUNTING...

This means that up till today, I have spent 15.5% of my life working, 57.5% of my life studying, 66.7% of my life playing softball and 10.7% of my life waiting for Flyboy.

Physics Lesson #1

Useful physics tip for everyone:

Counterbalancing will help stabilise an object.

Especially when said object is a wheelchair and your objective is to manoeuvre the wheelchair down a step about 10 cm high.

My dad took a fall last Friday night in the spirit of science. He was trying to show my grandma that a person sitting in a wheelchair can manoeuvre it down a 10cm high step without external aid. So, he sat in the wheelchair and as he moved forward he leaned BACK in the wheelchair instead of leaning forward. Of course, this caused the wheelchair to tip backwards so my dad fell back and hit his head on the floor.

Don't worry, he's fine. He played golf the next day so I think that's symptomatic of a full recovery. (Though you could make the argument that anyone who chooses to play golf for 5 hours on a blazing hot afternoon is really suffering from the effects of a fall, and I would not disagree there.) Aside from a bruised ego from us poking fun at him, he's fine. In fact he even suggested that I blog about it.

And so I did.

Oh and I can now swim 50 m freestyle without drowning in the process. That's progress, BABY! *grin*

But I still hate swimming, biking and running.

How Not To Run A Business

If you're planning to start a business, take some what-not-to-do tips from this eejit. This guy is really pissing me off, and if he pisses me off one more time I am going to start spreading bad press around. For now he will remain anonymous and I shall just call him The Eejit.

Incident #1
My colleague (from another office) got married overseas recently, and she engaged The Eejit to do her wedding photos and video. Since I was going to meet her for a business trip, she asked me to help her bring the wedding photos over and I agreed. My flight was on Sunday and she told me The Eejit would bring the photos over to the office on Friday.

Friday came without any news from The Eejit. It wasn't until Friday night, long after I had left the office, that he called to say that, surprise surprise, he could not make it. (Duh. You don't say.) Anyway we made alternative plans for The Eejit to deliver the photos to me at my home on Saturday.

Saturday came and went with no trace of photos or eejits. Not a phone call, or even a message. Nada. On Sunday afternoon he msged me - yes, he didn't even have the decency to call me - and said that he was very busy and would bring me the photos at the airport. When I asked if the photos would be very heavy he said that they were not and could definitely be hand-carried.

On Sunday night, we went to the airport. There was no sign of The Eejit, so I went ahead to check in. Then, I still had to wait around for him because he was late. Finally when he showed up about 30 minutes late, he passed me the package, which was FREAKING heavy. (400 photos enclosed in an album is not light.) I had to lug the damn thing all over Incheon and half of Seoul before I could pass it to my colleague.

That he was so tardy already got me quite irritated, but what took the cake was when he thanked me for being the courier and I sarcastically remarked that I would get my colleague to treat me to dinner, he said and I quote: "Don't worry, I will put in a good word for you."

*major eye-rolling going on* Put in a good word for me?! He should have been glad that I didn't start yelling at him for forcing me to hand carry the bloody thing. He should have been on his knees at Changi Airport thanking me for bringing it over and begging me not to complain to my colleague. Put in a good word for me, MY ASS.

Incident #2
That was a couple of months ago. Two days ago my colleague asked if I could help bring the wedding dvd over since I would be travelling in a few weeks' time, and I agreed again. Now this time, The Eejit was supposed to bring it to my office today, but he actually managed to get in touch earlier to ask if I could go pick it up instead. My reply was that I was extremely busy so I would not be able to pick it up. His subsequent reply (and this is what has gotten me really pissed off, enough to blog about it) was:

"I'm also having shoots everyday so it's quite difficult to deliver. Maybe you can send a courier over to collect?"

PLEASE.

1) I am doing you a favour by agreeing to bring it over. Delivery of the product is your responsibility; it is not mine nor my colleague's. Since I'm already doing you a favour, the least you could do is to bring it over to me. You should not even expect me to go over and pick it up.

2) To ask me to send a courier over is just ridiculous. That's just compounding the error. If you want it to be couriered, you should be the one getting the courier to send it over. Why should I go to the trouble and expense of getting something that you should be sending to me?

3) Between today and November 24th, which is when I am leaving, there are 13 working days, and I'm not counting Saturdays. Please don't tell me that you cannot find 30 minutes to drive over and drop the damn thing off.

4) In fact, in 13 working days you could have mailed the damn thing around the world, much less to another address in Singapore. Surely you can find the time to bung the DVD into an envelope and mail it??

What kind of company does he think he is running?! The level of customer service, or rather the total lack of it, is just appalling. If The Eejit pisses me off one more time I promise I will publish his company name here, and tell all my soon-to-be-married friends, of which I have a ton, not to use his services.

DUMBASS.

Introducing...

... a guest author - my sister! She's going to be a regular (I hope!) contributor, largely on food-related issues.

My sister is a Martha Wannabe and, before you say I'm being mean, let me forestall all accusations by pointing out that not only is she proud to be a Martha Wannabe, she also came up with that name by herself! She (my sister I mean) is a great cook, and she makes the meanest tiramisu. Pity she only makes it once a year, and only for her hubby's birthday. Yeah, we grew up together and she ONLY makes it for her hubby nowadays... So, whenever it's his birthday we all find an excuse to pop by, just so that we can get a taste of the cake!

Anyway I digress. Without further ado, I welcome June with her very own category and icon:

Domestic Goddess Without Domestic Help

Rendezvous in Hong Kong and Other Matters

What was originally a 3-day trip to Seoul has now morphed into an 11-day trip to Seoul, HK, Shanghai and Beijing with at least 21 company visits. I'm not particularly looking forward to living out of a suitcase for that long a time, but thanks to various bombshells dropped by various companies it's unavoidable.

Anyhow, I will be in Hong Kong from Thursday Aug 26th to Sunday Aug 29th. Friends are more than welcome to bunk in and enjoy a free stay on me!

In other developments: my friend Des fell over laughing at my tag story so much so that she wrote a version of it for me to send to various girlie mags like Cosmo and Her World. If we ever get published I'll definitely blog about it but it's such a gem that it would be a shame if no one else laid eyes on it. So, here it is (original content supplied by me, all words written by Des):

"For all you chicks out there who like to play a little peek-a-boo... make sure you only play it when you know you're playing it!

So there I was going up the lift to work. I was dressed a little more flirty than usual because I felt like it... working for a major investment house you sometimes just want to toe the line a little! But of course, nothing too foxy. I'm in the lift and this hottie patootie walks up and I'm thinking to myself, "Oh my! I'm simmering!" But playing the cool chickadee, I make a mild display of holding the doors open since he had a coffee in each hand. He walks by me to the back of the lift and I continue perusing my book coolly. After a while I feel his eyes on me and I tingle with excitement -- is he checking me out? Then at the 10th floor, he finally says to me: "Excuse me, your tag is showing."

Of all the tags a girl could have on her, it was my panty tag! I was Sloggi'd out for all the world to see! Good thing I work on the 14th floor -- I dashed out of the lift as soon as the doors opened, no tailwind from any of my other tags.

Tagfully yours,
Sloggitni"

Of course, for the US market we'll have to change it from Sloggi to something like Fruit of the Loom or Jockey!

And speaking of girlie mags, guys you don't have to be shy about reading Cosmo et al! No need to pretend that you're just flipping through for pictures of the chickies (although I'm sure that helps too). After all, only one tiny Y chromosome separates the men from the ladies so I'm sure that in the common X chromosome resides the propensity to be gossipy or to be interested in gossip.

Which leads me to today's QOTD, from my (male) cousin, who is a closet (or rather, bathroom) Cosmo and tabloids fan:

"I'm such a girl."

To that I say: Aiyah, don't shy lah... embrace your gossipy nature. There really isn't a need to have a cool, silent exterior.

How To Fall Flat On Your Face

So, today I met a cute guy in the lift today. He was walking behind me and I held the lift door open for him, and since his hands were full I pressed the button for his floor as well. And he actually spoke to me!

He said: "Excuse me, you have a tag sticking out of your back."

Remind me to always double-check that there aren't any tags sticking out of my butt.

Addendum
From my sister, who said:
"Aiyo, is this the only way you can get cute guys to speak to you? So sad... sigh"

Additions

Ok, couple of additions to the site since I've been reading up on HTML and stuff...

First, way down in the RH corner of the site, below "Now Screening", "Search" and "Login", there's a new sidebar called "Contact". Pretty self-explanatory, if you ask me.

Second, I've learnt how to put subdomains up on my site. Kudos again to Nat for patiently answering my questions via ICQ last night. And Nat, since you like seeing your name in big font so much...

THANKS NAT!
ooh... check out the cool blue font!

Anyhow, check out the new page. It's half in jest, but if any kind soul really wants to get those things for me, that would be way cool. I'm thinking next time, whenever I see something I like I'll put it up on the site so that people can refer to it if they need ideas. And yes, I know it's very hou lian pi to expect that people will want to get me presents but hey, isn't it a better use of their money? At least they'll know what I want!

Third, I learnt about lists in HTML, so check out the "Links" section on the RHS. Now it's got bullet points :)

That's it for today. Too tired to blog... I think I've come down with something cos today I woke up with a splitting headache and decided to take the morning off. Got into work at 1130am. Yup, that's right, ossbay-omanway is not around today :)

Aside: Anyhow, I figured I deserved a rest for working so damn hard the past 3.5 weeks. My body (and brain for that matter) is not used to this much exertion, I think! Hard work is not for me.

Número Ciento

Wow. This blog is one hundred entries old. I think some celebration is in order here, so I've spent the past few days trying to think of a suitable subject for entry #100.

Utter and complete failure.
Of course, I could
1) whine about singlehood and my lack of a social life;
2) rant about work and my lack of motivation;
3) complain about how my softball team trainings keep getting cancelled, so that as a result I just keep getting fatter;
4) bitch about various people who have offended me just by converting oxygen into carbon dioxide;
5) go on and on about Flyboy, Juan Carlos and Rodrigo (yes, we are indeed on a first-name basis here) and the Giants and baseball; or,
6) make one of those lists that I am so fond of doing.

But I shan't.

The 100th entry deserves to be a classy entry.

It deserves to be on some suitably thought-provoking topic with bombastic words thrown about impressively (but since I don't know many bombastic words, aside from "bombastic", and I am too lazy to open up Microsoft Word and use the thesaurus function, I shall have to forego sounding intelligent).

This entry deserves to be different from the rest of my inane rantings and ravings. Which basically means this entry deserves to get read.
(I would have put in a counter a long time ago, if not for fear of hurting my ego.)

Aside: (Hm. Does the period go inside or outside of the close bracket?) I guess since the question mark goes inside the bracket, then the period goes inside. But what if the brackets come at the end of a sentence? You can't very well end a sentence like this (or can you?)
Shouldn't it be something like this (or maybe not)?
I think I need to lay my hands on a copy of "Eats, Shoots and Leaves".
End of aside

But I have failed. My mind is a complete and utter blank. As blank as the various idiot salespeople that populate our fair island who only know one word and that is "HAR?", or as blank as the look on the face of the waiter who is standing directly in your line of sight, at whom you've been waving at for the last 10 minutes to try and get some plain water, just some plain water for the love of all that is good and right...

I digress. I have no idea what kind of an entry could even begin to celebrate the momentousness - which, by the way, is actually a real word - of this occasion. I have writer's block. Or rather, blogger's block. So much so that I don't know how to end this.

So.
To my 6 readers, thank you. I hope the few minutes you spend here aren't a waste of time :)
Aiyah, what a lame way to end...

Running on a treadmill...

... and getting nowhere fast. This pretty much sums up how I feel about my life now.

Let's see, I have friends who
1) have gotten or are going to get their Master's/PhDs;
2) have gotten married, are getting married, or are getting engaged;
3) have gotten their own apartment and are no longer living with parents;
4) have made significant strides in their careers;
5) are going overseas to work; and/or
6) have significant others.

While I am stuck here in Singapore, with none of the above. Man, I feel like such a failure. If I look at my life two years ago vs. now, nothing has changed except that I now own a car (ah Sam, the light of my life) and I no longer have to take the CFA exams.

My room is as messy as ever, I still swing from loving my job to hating it (right now, surprise surprise, I'm hating it...), my photos are still unorganised, my closet is still unorganised, I still live with my parents (!!), my social life is deader than the deadest of doornails... Yup, things sure have changed.

Anyhow, to celebrate my depressed mood tonight, I've added a new feature - a mood-o-meter. Right now, and appropriately too, it says that I am depressed.
* This icon and future icons from here

I hereby declare that if I do not get promoted by 2005, I will quit my job and go back to school.

Mauritius!

The trip was a great getaway and I came back really relaxed and slightly tanned. If you're looking to dive/snorkel, then this time of year the water is a bit too cold (but you get used to it after a few minutes). But it's a great time for tanning because there's plenty of sun and yet a nice cool breeze prevents you from overheating. Also, there's less cyclones lurking on the horizon than in summer.

We stayed at the Beau Rivage, which is a really nice hotel on the eastern coast. Every room has a sea view, and the food is great. Just one word of caution though, if your accomodation is on a half-board (i.e. breakfast and dinner) basis then be sure to pack some nicer clothes for dinner! Most of the hotel guests were European and they dress up for dinner. We were conspicuous enough as the only Asians in the hotel, but we also stood out as the table that wore the same thing to dinner every night, because we had only packed one set of 'nice' clothes. On our last night, it was "Gala Dinner" and I had visions of being sent to eat in the kitchen because we weren't appropriately dressed. Luckily that didn't happen :)

Most of the seasports are provided FOC at the hotel, like snorkelling, windsurfing, kayaking and water-skiing. Mauritius has a coral reef around it, and the waves break about 200m from the shore. So, we decided to paddle all the way out to the edge of the reef because we saw a fisherman standing in the water and we wanted to see how shallow the water was. By the time we got close to the edge, my oar was scraping the top of the coral, and I felt a bit like Reepicheep (ref: The Narnia Chronicles by C.S. Lewis if you have no idea what I'm talking about) paddling to the Edge of the World. Then, the hotel coast guard came out to get us (hehe) but instead of getting a scolding the guy just said that we should keep away from the edge because if anything were to happen to us, the water was too shallow for the speed boat to help us.

On our last day, we took an excursion to Ile des Deux Cocos - sounds really nice in French but it basically means "Island with two coconut trees". It's a small island (you can walk around it in 20 minutes or less) just off the south coast of Mauritius, with a Moroccan villa, a beach, and snorkelling nearby. If you've got spare cash to burn you can rent the villa (sleeps 4) for 100,000 Mauritian rupees a night. That's about 3500 USD or about 6250 SGD. For that sum, you get the villa (which, admittedly, is very picturesque) and the whole island to yourself, plus food and drinks. The snorkelling is supposed to be one of the better spots around as well. Our excursion included a buffet bbq lunch and free flow of drinks, including champagne and various liquors. Very relaxing.
Oh, and by now there's about 600 coconut trees on the island so maybe it should be renamed as Ile des Six Cents Cocos...

Sadly, we didn't go very far afield from the hotel, so no comments on Port Louis etc. The local people we encountered were all extremely friendly and they parlez anglaise! So it's easy to get around.

The only things I have to add are
a) the roads in Mauritius definitely need improving, and;
b) once you've passed the immigration checkpoint when departing Mauritius, there's no currency exchange booth, which means that if you have leftover rupees and you want to change them, you'll have to buy something at the duty-free shop and get your change back in USD or Euros.

My photos are developed but not scanned yet (NAT! We have to go get me a scanner!) but here are some photos from the digicam. Enjoy!

30 Minutes To Go...

... before I can go home! Yippee :D It's been a pretty slow Monday, plus for some reason I'm really stoned today. My memory is shot to bits and I'm really really tired.

Anyhow, highlight of the day: finally finding out the name of this song I first heard on the radio a couple of weeks ago. It's a Chinese song, nice tune, fairly touching lyrics. I heard it a while back but I kept missing out on the name of the singer and the song, so I decided to stake out 93.3 FM in an effort to catch the song. My efforts were rewarded at 1625 today, and I even got the lyrics, thanks to Christina (best pitcher in Singapore)!

Mauritius on Saturday! Woohoo! Tonight, I'm going to snorkel in the pool to try out my new mask and practice mask-clearing, which I really really hate doing. I hate getting water in my eyes whenever I'm swimming, plus I have this fear that my contacts will float away. So, asking me to deliberately introduce water into my mask is just... icky.

Other highlights of the weekend: celebrating my cousin's birthday at East Side. The music gets pretty good around midnight, that is if you're into Mambo-type music. I never used to like dancing, but nowadays I think it's pretty fun. And I'm sure the copious amount of alcohol I imbibe has nothing to do with that! Ha.

BUT! A fat ass said I should exercise more. ARGH. It's never a good sign when someone says you're fat, but when a FAT ASS says you're fat, it's even worse.

SIGH.

Here are the lyrics, just in case you were curious:

除此之外

Say Goodnight　晚安　謝謝妳陪我一整個夜晚
Close your eyes, be quiet　我明白妳有自己的不安
很多來不及我不曾看見　我只遇見妳的現在
不管妳接受或離開　I hope to stay for a while

除此之外　要妳明白　妳的笑我真是喜歡看
於是我一次又一次等待　其實都還算愉快
除此之外　非常遺憾　妳的心我還是打不開
And if you need somebody　我確定我會在　不會走開

So Goodbye　晚安　捨不得看妳覺得不自在
It's alright, I'm fine　看起來　這故事會寫不完
很多差一點妳沒有發現　妳只認識我的現在
不管妳留下或走開　I'm gonna stay for a while

除此之外　我要妳明白　妳的笑我真是喜歡看
於是我一次又一次等待　其實都還算愉快
除此之外　非常遺憾　妳的心我還是打不開
And if you need somebody　我確定我會在
除此之外　我還在等待　妳的心將為我敞開
But if you need somebody　你知道我會在　不會走開　不會走開

Hey! You can have Mandarin characters on this! Way cool. And the coding is quite interesting: "&#" followed by "22335" = 圿. Which means I can basically type out a sentence in Mandarin if I know all the codes. Let's try: 我喜歡妳 (25105, 21916, 27489, 22963)

Hahahahaha :D

Tales of A Backseat Singer

Heh, after reading the comments by Marie and FJ on the previous post, I have decided to spill the beans :)

Basically, after a night of drinking (actually we didn't drink much) June decides she wants to karaoke. But it's 130 am and no one else wants to go so she makes me put on Rene Liu's CD in the car, song #2, which is "Hou Lai". Then she grabs Murphy the Moose (if I had a digital camera I could put up a photo of it but I don't, so use your imagination), which is a Bendable Buddies toy moose that Cheng gave me last year (Thanks Cheng!). Since Murphy is a Bendable Buddy, that basically means that all his limbs, his head and his antlers can be bent in any direction.

So my sis grabs Murphy and makes Kim sing along with her, using Murphy's nose as a mike. And Kim is half-asleep, plus he doesn't know the song, so he only joins in on the last word of every sentence.

June: HOU LAI (all in caps cos she's basically shouting in my ear)
Kim: lai lai lai...
June: Wo zhong suan xue hui le...
Kim: le le le...
June: Ru he qu ai, ke xi ni...
Kim: ni ni ni...

Get the idea? This goes on for the whole song. All 4 mins 02 seconds of it. And in between singing my sister is saying things like "Damn, Murphy is a great mike!! Two people can sing together!!"

By the time I drop them off and get home, Murphy's lying in a mangled heap on my front seat, looking like he's just been in a very messy hit-and-run. Poor thing...

Oh, and earlier on when we got to the bar at Raffles Link, I made my sister say this:

June: Hi, my name is June and I'm an alcoholic!
All of us: HI JUNE!

B E(ssay) OTD

So I was chatting with Nat today and somehow or other the conversation got round to Singaporean guys we would do:

So on my list (if I can think of any more I'll add it on), there is, in no particular order:
1) Vincent Ng - heartland hottie with a bod to die for. Qualifies as my dream guy since I did dream of him, once...
2) Benjamin Heng - cute in a kooky way, plus he has that bad-boy thing going on...
3) Qi Yiwu - needs to get rid of that Taiwanese (i.e. long, curly locks) look. But otherwise he's candy, candy, candy!
4) James Lye - who can resist that grin? Plus his bod's not too bad (though not as good as Mr Ng).
5) Shaun Chen - another one of those slightly bad-boy personas that I cannot resist.

Here's where it got bitchy. Nat mentioned that Christopher Lee was also on her list, at which point I said:

"Sorry, anyone who would do F (Are you my primary school classmate? No, I am your primary school teacher!) W is off my list. He may be fan-f**king-tastically cute but still... Plus, have you seen the hairdos he gets for those award thingies? I mean, it's bad taste compounded by even more bad taste!"

At which point Nat pointed out that this was not just a BQOTD but a bitchy essay of the day, hence the title...

In fact, this is how we got around to chatting about guys we'd do.

On my way to work today there was an interview segment on the radio with the new Ms. SG Universe, some 19-year-old with long legs. Anyway there's been a minor storm in the teacup with people writing in to complain about how the contestants looked and sounded. So today, callers were complaining (as usual) about how we should look for girls who were pretty and smart enough to make the nation proud blah blah blah...

And I'm sitting there thinking: Geez people, can't we just accept that
a) we're not even that well-educated as a whole;
b) effectively we're a nation of dwarfs, and;
c) collectively we're fugly!

Plus, you're making two key assumptions here, which are that
1) a female with the right mix of beauty, height (because there is a height requirement and because we are, as I have mentioned, Dwarf Nation) and brains exists in Singapore, and;
2) this person would want to take part in the contest.

At which point I mentioned some comment some celebrity made on the issue, Nat said she'd do him, I went "Him?!? Why?!?" and thus, a blog entry was born.

Anyway... I found one more icon! A grumpy ninja for Pet Peeves - took that from the Pucca site. That leaves two more...

YAY! It's 6pm! Time to go home and enjoy the long weekend!

Happy Easter! Not that I'm religious or anything...
Hm. I'll amend that.

Happy Public Holiday!

HTML rules!

Unless you're colour blind, you should have seen that the blog has been changing of late. Specifically, more images, more colour and a Picture of the Day section.

Why? Just cos I've been bored and just playing around with HTML. But it's not like anyone will notice, only faithful (and very zo bo) Nat - I think there is a perfect correlation with blog readership and free time i.e. unemployment but thanks Nat!

Anyway, here's another new thing. Notice that coffee cup up to the right? That's my new icon for blog entries filed under "Just Wasting Time". And, if you click on it, you go straight to the "Just Wasting Time" archives. Woohoo!

So far I've only got two icons - the coffee cup and the kitten for "BQOTD". Kitten = catty, get it? And just so I don't get into trouble, both the coffee cup and the kitten came from MSN Messenger. When I have more free time, I'll think of and put in icons for the other categories.

I Need...

...to be lying on a beach with a in hand, not freezing my ass off with 3 layers of clothing and a scarf wrapped around my head, worrying about internet companies in China or Korea, or water treatment companies in Singapore, or other shit like that.

I need to be reading chick-lit that you can mindlessly finish in half a day, and magazines like my beloved and , which are gathering dust in my room.

I need sun, where I can come back a nice toasty brown, wearing my tanlines with pride, like veterans with their war wounds.

I need to be able to veg out as I please.

I need to go on a break.

I need this.

Who wants in?

Argentina from A to Z

Over lunch, I was emailing and describing my Argentina trip for what seemed to be the tenth time. So I decided to put it up here instead.

Photos will be up soon - I developed them already but since I steadfastly refuse to succumb to the digital camera trend (go ahead, call me a Luddite) it'll take a while to scan everything in. Add to that the fact that my scanner is not installed and I'm looking to buy a new one, and it's an even longer shot that anything will be done by this weekend.

Anyway if you're interested to find out about Argentina, read on. Else, go surf somewhere else.
Word of warning, this is a REALLY LONG entry.

Argentina was a great place for a holiday and I really hope to go back in the near future to cover the places that I missed. Any takers?

Firstly: the scenery is lovely and the country is so huge that you get rainforests at one end and glaciers at the other - the diversity is staggering. And the scenery is not just picture-postcard pretty but a much more powerful desolate beauty. One of the thoughts that kept running through my mind was how similar it was to New Zealand but so much more stark and desolate. LOTR could definitely have been filmed there, and the effect would have been bleaker.

Secondly: the people are really friendly. I found that Argentines were a very smiley people, and were quite happy to chat even though we hardly spoke any Spanish and most of them hardly spoke English. They're also very family-oriented. On most of the excursions, we saw families going for vacations together. Grandparents, parents, kids, cousins, aunts and uncles - just one big happy family.
Only complaint: people there don't speak enough English! Either that or there should be better arrangements for tourists. It's a good thing I took some Spanish but I have to say my Spanish is really quite sucky.

Thirdly: the guys are HOT! For every Maradona there are three Rodrigo Santoros. (If you don't know the former you must be female and under 20; if you don't know the latter you must be male. And I know RS is Brazilian but it's just an example.)
Sadly the ladies are pretty too, so the guys are pretty much unavailable. But hey, eye candy beats eyesores any day.

Fourthly (can you say "fourthly" or is it just "fourth"?): almost everything is cheap. Since the devaluation you pretty much have a 1st-world country at 3rd-world prices. On our first day we walked around downtown and were amazed to find signs like "Hamburguesa + Papas Fritas + Bebida o Gaseosa: 2 pesos" - that translates into "Hamburger + Fries + Drink or Gassy drink: 2 pesos".
Double scoop of gelato: 2.50 pesos.
1/2 kg of gelato: 5 pesos.
Movie tickets: 5 pesos.
Tickets to the opera: starting from 3 pesos (standing room) and ending up nowhere near the ridiculous prices that the Esplanade charges.
Nice blouse from a funky-looking shop: 30 pesos.
Dinner at a nice restaurant for 9 people: 175 pesos.
Monthly rent for a house on the delta: 200 pesos.
And now for the really jaw-dropping number: 1SGD = 1.7 pesos. You do the math.

Fifthly (I've given up on the debate on whether you can add a "ly" after): Buenos Aires is one of the nicest places in the world to live in. It's like an old European capital but cheaper, cleaner, less decrepit, and more happening on the weekends. The street layout ensures that you will never ever get lost in BA - everything is laid out in a grid, with only a few roads running at diagonals. Every block is 100 metres square and the numbers basically let you know exactly where you need to go. On the weekends there's neighbourhood fairs and street markets around, there's gelaterias everywhere (yummy!), plenty of shopping malls with really nice shops, 3-hr excursions out of the city, and everywhere you look in summertime people are just hanging out, lying on the grass.
P.S.: If you're an antiques fan, head to San Telmo on Sundays, if you're a handicrafts/local crafts fan, head to Recoleta near the cemetary on weekends. At the San Telmo feria there was a really cool stall selling figurines made out of old forks and spoons. If I hadn't run of money I definitely would have bought one. Just another reason to go back :)

Even though I had many warnings about the security issues it really wasn't a problem. There are security guards posted at street corners, and some restaurants take the precaution of locking the doors (but maybe this was to keep out the street urchin that tried to get in after we left?). Guidebooks and locals warned us about taking licensed cabs and not jumping into unmarked cabs. But I feel that as long as you take the necessary care (who goes jumping into unmarked cabs anyway?!) BA is not more dangerous than any other capital city.

As for the places we visited, I think there'll be a better idea when the photos are up. We went south to Calafate (glaciers, glaciers and more glaciers. Bring sunscreen!), up north to Bariloche (Tahoe-like region - check out the Blest cerveceria i.e. brewery), north-east to Iguazu (waterfalls. HUGE waterfalls. Be prepared to get wet.) and then back down to Buenos Aires (don't forget to catch a tango show!). My favourites would be Calafate with the fresh air and quaint little town, and Buenos Aires (see point #5).

Other places that we missed but sounded interesting: Ushuaia (southern-most city in the world), Mendoza (wine country), Corrientes (for Carnaval-like atmosphere in February), Cordoba and the surrounding region around BA. Also Aconcagua for rock climbing and skiing. More reasons to go back!

Food was generally very good, but if you're a vegetarian then you'll come back really skinny. Everywhere on the menu it was meat meat and more meat. Menus were pretty standard throughout Argentina, with sandwiches, hamburgers, steak sandwiches (lomitos), pastas, pizzas and meat dishes available. Vegetables were only available as a salad. In BA there's more choice of course, and we spent our last night in BA at a Vietnamese restaurant that was quite yummy - Sudestada. Just make sure you make reservations: we blundered in but managed to get 3 seats at the bar, where the owner/bartender was really nice to us and gave us some free drinks.
On our last day I had a really good smoked salmon pasta at a pub in San Telmo.
And don't forget to eat the gelato! Yum yum. My fav combination: menta granida y frambuesa.

Shopping is pretty good in BA as well. There's lots of shopping malls (Paseo Alcorta and Gallerias Pacifica are the two we visited), and the local brands are pretty good buys. The fairs are pretty cheap too - there was a stall in the Recoleta fair that sold glass jewellry, and at first I decided to just buy one ring but after I found out that the rings were only 4 pesos I bought the entire lot. Next time I go I'll have to devote more time to shopping :)

Ok I'll stop rambling now, but just one more word of advice: the country is huge so for tourists, flying is really the best option time-wise because you really don't want to sit on a bus for 20 hours. But internal flights are expensive. And it must be that the pilots are lousy or the planes are old, because those internal flights were 5 of the most harrowing I have ever had. The three of us looked at each other with grey faces after landing (with a sideways skid) at Calafate, and on subsequent flights it wasn't much better. Either that or the weather conditions in Argentina make for turbulent flying, in which case the pilots must then be really skilled. I'm just not sure I want to stick around to find out.

Oh, and it was quite tough to make all the arrangements from here, especially for internal flights. I was lucky to have colleagues there who helped out, so muchas gracias to Marina, Verena and Jose! Any questions, put them in the comments page :)

Dog Tired, Cont'd

Man. I am so tired. So much so that I was nearly late for work today. Luckily the bird that I have often contemplated shooting because it persists in cawing early in the morning did its usual wakeup call and woke me up at 0830. And, in doing so, won a reprieve 'cos now I'm actually grateful it woke me up.

Anyway, the past weekend was one of the busiest ever! Saturday I spent making pineapple tarts, Sunday loveletters. BTW we have now renamed them stressed letters to differentiate them from those that are flooding the supermarkets for the princely sum of $3.20 for 100. Ours are priced at $32 for 100 because... well, just because.

On Saturday I woke up at 1000, started making tarts till 1230, rushed downtown for my class, rushed back home to continue making tarts and didn't stop till 2030. Make dough, roll dough, cut out tart base, put pineapple ball, glaze with egg white, bake, and repeat ad infinitem. Or rather, ad nauseum.

Like I said earlier, the house is overflowing with tarts so those who are supposed to come get them (i.e. NAT!) please come and get them as soon as possible.
Then after the whole tart-making thing, I went to play mahjong and didn't get home till 0400. But hey, at least I made some money out of mahjong.
*grin*
So the day wasn't that wasted after all.

And then on Sunday, the whole loveletter-making thing started at 1100. If you've never made loveletters before, you should try. It's quite fun once you get past the burning sensation in your fingers when you roll the freaking-hot thing.
To make loveletters you will need the following ingredients:
1) BBQ pit or satayman pit
2) Good fans that work and don't come apart the minute you use them. That means, no free paper fans from Shell or other petrol stations.
3) Tons and tons of charcoal
4) Batter
5) Moulds
6) Knives and wooden spoons
7) 5 people - one to pour the batter, two to man the moulds, one to roll the damn things (that's my job), one to pack and make extra batter.
8) More people - one to provide comic relief, one to be the fire marshal, one to run errands like get water, get food, get the damn dogs away from us, answer the phone, open the door...
9) Champagne or other forms of alcohol - optional. Aids in providing comic relief.

Instructions:
Put all 7 ingredients together in a well-ventilated area for at least 7 hours. Discard the first 50 or so because the moulds have to get seasoned. Discard the next 50 or so, because of uneven thickness and colour. Spend 20 minutes bitching. Cheer when the first good one is produced. Drink champagne (if at hand). Continue with process of pouring batter onto hot moulds, turning moulds over grill and rolling the flat pancake-like thingies. Cheer when you reach double-digits, i.e. ten. Drink more champagne (if at hand). Continue with process. Cheer when you pack the first bottle. Drink more champagne (if any left). Get depressed when you realise how much time has been taken and how little has been produced. Polish off champagne. Start burning fingers and swearing.

Makes 4 bottles worth of loveletters. That's like... 300 for 7 hours work! And places like NTUC can sell 100 for $3.20? That's f**king ridiculous!

Anyhow, that was the weekend. Now to sleep the day away in air-conditioned comfort, in the office... NOT! Sleep deprivation, here I come.

How To Build A Computer In One Night

Ok, so I was supposed to write something on the whole computer building process and since I am a) on a ministrike at work because there's so much to do and I just don't want to do it now, and; b) still slightly depressed, so here goes:

Friday 9 Jan 2004:
2230h - Operation "Build Scrabby A Computer" begins. 2 experienced personnel (trained in California and Philadelphia) arrive and begin setting up equipment.

2245h - Slightly less experienced techie clears out a tiny space on Scrabby's spare bed and proceeds to snore rhythmically throughout the rest of the night. More experienced techie (let's just call this person Nat) starts directing total rookie Scrabby to open all the boxes. Scrabby persists in asking questions like "what is this" and "what does this do".

2300h - The CPU is placed on the mobo and Nat produces a silvery paste-thingy to much oohing and aahing from the audience. Scrabby is highly amused by the fan that comes along with the CPU.
Problems arise when the team attempts to install the mobo. The washers somehow don't really fit on the screws. Panic ensues. The team tries various means to fit the washers (which are really tiny so our big clunky fingers keep dropping them) onto the screws but to no avail.

2330h - The mobo is placed on hold while we work on other things. The team hits another snag as we discover that the thingy where you plug your mouse, keyboard, monitor etc etc (henceforth known as Thingy A) does not fit into the casing. We try ways and means to fit round pegs into square holes. At this point, a prata supper is looking less and less likely.
Suddenly, Scrabby's mom discovers an alternate piece that fits Thingy A. Scrabby then attempts to remove the original piece from the casing, with a sharp screwdriver, much force and even more swearing.
Note: All stunts are performed by highly trained professionals in controlled environments. Do not attempt this at home.
The team cheers as the new piece of extremely sharp metal is installed. Slightly less experienced techie (let's just call this person Leon) continues sleeping despite all the noise.

Saturday 10 Jan 2004:
0000h - The operation continues. The team is still stuck on the washer problem. The brute force method is employed but fails. ("Not by the fan! Don't hold the mobo by the fan! But it's so convenient to hold it by the fan!") The washers just will not stick onto the screws and instead, by some strange magnetic replusion, fall off the screws everytime the team attempts to install the mobo.
Another problem: Nat's tongs (for picking up small thingies like washers), while long which is good so you can reach into hard-to-reach places, also have a tendency to drop small thingies like washers if you don't grip it near the head, thereby making the length a moot point.
Scrabby produces a Tweezerman ("WTF is a Tweezerman? Eh, it's like the best tweezer ok... I bought it at Walgreens for 18 USD. Guaranteed to tweeze even the finest hairs.") and the Tweezerman lives up to its billing.
Still, the washer problem is not solved. Every now and then, Nat and Scrabby mutter curses under their breath. Ideas are thrown around and shot down. The team's morale is at its lowest point.
Finally, the team decides to adopt Scrabby's idea: lick the washers so that they can stick onto the screws temporarily.
Warning: What you are about to see is highly graphic. Viewers are advised not to attempt this without proper supervision. Do not do this at home. Do not do this in public. In fact, do not attempt this ever. It's just humiliating to have to lick teeny tiny washers and try to make them stick onto screws.

0030h - Amazingly, Scrabby's idea works. The magnetic repulsion properties of the washers dissipate in the wake of Scrabby's saliva, and the saliva-coated washers STAY ON the screws. Cheers (and another soft snore).

0045h - The team turn their attention to disk drives. Scrabby's mom produces a magnetic screwdriver that actually works wonders on the teeny tiny screws. Scrabby mutters "Bad design" continually. Nat wonders why the hell she ever agreed to do this, and thinks "Man, they're not paying me enough. I'm STARVING and I want my murtabak!". Leon continues to sleep.

0130h - Finally, all the pieces are installed. The next step, connecting all the wires and cables. Scrabby expresses amazement that the whole computer building process is so tedious and everything is so badly designed. There are big-ass cables and wires running all over the place. A bunch of wires keep falling onto the fan, so Scrabby's mom suggests tying the wires up together but there don't seem to be any cable ties lying around. Scrabby proceeds to strip some old wire to use as a tie. After this is done, the team finds cable ties lying all over the place.

0145h - Scrabby's mom goes to bed. The team now swears and cusses openly, instead of under their breath. Scrabby practises her Hokkien swearing as the CD-R drive keeps having to be screwed into place and then taken out again.

0200h - It is DONE. Now to see if everything works. The team hooks up the computer, but first Nat expresses disgust at the amount of dust when Scrabby removes the old computer. ("Wah lau, so gross! Eh, it's not my fault ok, my maid never clean.")
0210h - The computer is plugged in and IT WORKS! The team cheers! Leon slumbers on. Scrabby expresses amazement that Leon can sleep ("Man, how can he sleep with all this noise?") at which point Leon promptly gives her the finger.
The team proceed to install Windows XP. Prata supper is now looking a distinct possibility.

0230h - Another snag. Scrabby's mouse works on a USB and the USB driver just won't work. The mouse is dead as a doornail. What's worse, the program to install the driver keeps hanging.
Suddenly Leon wakes up and decides to clear a bigger space on the bed. Now he can sleep lengthwise on the bed instead of width-wise.

0250h - The team continues to grapple with the problem. Leon wakes up again, this time to grab a pillow. Scrabby wonders aloud why Leon didn't just do all this in the beginning and Leon gives her yet another finger.

0300h - The team decides to call it a day. Tired, hungry and cranky, the team (sans Leon) make their way to Beauty World to grab a bite. The computer can wait...

So there it is, the chronicle of my attempt to build a computer. There's nothing much to add except that on Sunday my friend (muchas gracias, mi amigo) came over and finished up with all the remaining bugs.
It's been an educational process and I might do it again. I just wish that the parts were better designed so that the process could be much easier. But hey, now that I have my computer, I ain't complaining!

Top 10 reasons for moving to Brazil

Ok, I am moving to Brazil. Or anywhere in Latin America, for that matter. And why?
1) Beaches beaches beaches
2) Sun sun sun
3) Tons of diving
4) Guys guys guys
5) Cheap stuff everywhere
6) Party atmosphere - CARNIVAL!
7) Food, glorious food
8) Bossa Nova and samba (and the tango in neighbouring Argentina)
9) The rest of Latin America a stone's throw away, instead of a 24 hour flight away

And finally...
10) They say a picture is worth a thousand words so here goes:

Most of those words would be DROOL...

Want to see more of Rodrigo?
Go to "Say Cheese" in the Links section or click on the photo! Another new skill I've picked up :)